Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Week 15 - St. Louis, LA They are Still the Lambs

The Texans won 16-13 and still fans have to be talked in off the ledge. The way the blogosphere, talk radio, newspaper comments and fans are jabbering, you get the feeling fans would have preferred the Texans to lose. Or have Texans fans just turned into the biggest whinniest fans south of Dallas? Is Houston the new Dallas? All this noise about Denver South should be called Dallas South?

Bad win, good loss, moral victory. Three concepts that belong in the category of Santa, the Easter Bunny and an honest politician. They don't exist. A win is still a win, a loss is still a loss and a moral victory is for pussies and losers.

I'll be the first to admit the Texans looked like crap. Again. But the bottom line is when the game clock read 00:00 the scoreboard showed Texans 16 Rams 13. All you crybabies go cheer for the Cowboys.

Fumblitis is Contagious?
The Rams had to cancel practice due to the swine flu. Can the Texans cancel the run game due to fumblitis? What the hell is wrong with the backs? Steve Slaton was the chief offender. Chris Brown the fumbler at critical times. Ryan Moats didn't want to be left out against Seattle and now Arian Foster put the ball on the carpet. I don't even have any comments about the issue.

Simply the Best in the Universe?
''He can do it all,'' Rams cornerback Ron Bartell said about Andre Johnson. ''He's got the size, speed, run after the catch, blocking, everything. There's nobody in this league that compares to him.''

That's a hell of a compliment from Bartell. He faces Larry Fitzgerald twice year...the only other receiver that I consider All-Universe caliber.

The Other Brown
Again, Kris Brown missed a field goal. Crucial? Maybe. Who was once Mr. Reliable has become a giant question mark. He just isn't consistent. At this point I don't think anything is physically wrong with him. I think it's all mental. A friend of mine who is a Steeler fan hates Brown. He claims that Brown had the Texans fooled for the last seven season. I don't agree. The overall body of work as a Texan kicker proves Brown was reliable. With the exception of this season, he's been money for the Texans. I can't say that someone can be that consistent for seven years and pulled the wool over the eyes of coaches and management.

Brown missed two field goals that would have sent games into overtime. If the Texans are to contend for a playoff spot next year then this has to improve. In a tight race field goals can mean the difference between playing or staying home. The Texans can't allow this to linger as they've let it this year. They can't be fickle out of a misplaced sense of loyalty to Brown. He either improves over the summer or they find someone who can put the ball through the uprights.

I have some more thoughts later tomorrow after work. Tired and need some sleet.

Thursday, December 17, 2009

Week 15 - Sleepiness With Seattle

Note: I wrote a week 14 edition but evidently I never posted it.

It was going to be one of those games. What games you ask? Well for starters, which Texans team is going to show up? Will they show up in the first half and go home? Or get to the game late and play the second half? Will they build a big lead and blow it? Or did they stop caring in Jacksonville last week?

Friends, Romans, Countrymen

Well something to that effect. Gary Kubiak made an impassioned speech Saturday night before the game and fired up the team to victory.

So that begs me to ask...Where the f**k was that passion, oh, about the time of the NY Jets game? Or even a week ago at Jacksonville? Or the Monday Nighter against the Titans? Or both Colts games? Or or or...you get the picture.

Why do they wait until they are pretty much out of playoff contention to get fired up? That fire should have been in the belly from game one.

Back to the Game
Outstanding opening play. Obviously. The Texans went to a quick count and caught the Seattle defense napping. Matt Schaub hit Andre Johnson down the sideline for a long TD pass on the first play from scrimmage.

The offense played a near flawless first half. Not much to nit pick at. I could rant and rave about a run game but that's beating my head against a dead horse.

The Run Game
Okay, I'll touch on something quickly about the running attack. Besides that it still sucks.

For crying out loud just freakin' hold onto the damn ball. Ryan Moats coughed it up (you know the savior of the run game after the Bills win).

The bright side is Arian Foster didn't fumble. And he had a nice day catching the ball to boot. I'd give him a game ball for not fumbling but with my luck he'd fumble the game ball.

F for Effort
Was anyone really trying for the Seahawks? Matt Hasselbeck appeared to me as the only player on offense making any effort.

Despite the long TD to start off with, I thought Marcus Trufant played a decent game too. Where the f**k was Aaron Curry? I think I heard his name called once. Or did he even play? I'm not sure anymore.

Unless Mike Holmgren is the new GM in Seattle, Jim Mora is probably out as head coach.

A for Effort
The Seattle fans behind me sure gave all they got cheering for their team. It might have been a game if the players put that much effort into the game.

It was three ladies, probably around 50-ish, cheering for the 'hawks. One of them went missing before kick off. She made it back right before the end of the 1st quarter.

One asked,"Where have you been?"

She replied,"Looking for the right beer and it took me five tries.

The other lady said,"Five?"

"Yup, this is my fifth one. And it's good."

Yeah lady, five beers in a quarter and I'm pretty sure it would taste good to me too. It's the only way I survived the 2-14 season.

Finally Analysis
No new of fresh insight for me to add this late in the week and on the verge of week 16. In a nut shell, the teams boasted a similar record going in but Texans were the superior team. Seattle players looked like they pretty much quit on Mora. The Texans don't appear to have quit on Kubiak. Yet.

Kris Brown has probably brought on some serious contenders next year for the Texans. Clutch field goal misses on top of others he doesn't miss were costly. If the Texans try to up grade on of the Last Original Texans then should expect more of the same. His track record in Pittsburgh speaks the same.

It's a quiet possibility that old Bill Shakespeare makes another appearance this year.

Finally it looks like DGDB&D went dark again. So long guys all though Big Fat Drunk has taken his act over to the Battle Red Blog.

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Week 13 - Jack Del Rio Pwned Gary Kubiak

Remember last year I harked and barked about the only thing keep Jack Del Rio from earning the name of Worst Head Coach in the NFL was Herm Edwards. Upon the firing of Edwards, Del Rio assumed the mantle.

And that Gary Kubiak is bad news for you. The Texans used to own the Jacksonville Jaguars. They were at least good for a season split. Not this year. In the last four meetings with the Hags, Kubiak is now 1-3. The only win was last year's Monday Night game.

So congrats are in order to Gary Kubiak. You are currently Del Rio's bitch and that doesn't bode well for your Houston coaching future.

The Game


I'll be honest. I worked the graveyard shift the night before the game. I normally make it to the opening kick off and through the game. Given the playoffs slipping away I decided to try and get some sleep.

So when I did wake up the Texans were in the hole and the Sex Cannon was in. Uh oh is all I thought. Of course, Steve Tasker and Gus Johnson are no help. They rambled on endlessly about a back up quarterback's daily routine. No wonder Texans fans hate their coverage.

Fortunately Schaub came back and almost lead the Texans back to victory. He immediately lead Texans to a TD on his first possession back. The game seemed to finally be turning.

It's not like they had their chances. The defense came up big and made a goal line stop early in the game. They dropped Jags quarterback David Garrard for a safety and the special teams recovered a muff punt. In the end though the offense wasn't able to capitalize on those errors. I can't recall the details, not that I want to at this point, but the offense either got two field goals or one field goal off the possession after the safety and recovered punt.

Remarkably the team was still within striking distance.

The Half Back Option Heard 'round the Houston Metro Area


Then the brain farts start. The Texans were starting to game some momentum even though trailing 23-12. Schaub hit Angry 'dre Johnson on a 53 yard play to the Texans in scoring position. A few players later the Texans have 1st and goal. In one of the worst calls and poorly executed plays in Texans history, RB Chris Brown looked for TE Joel Dreesen in the end zone. Under heavy pressure Brown heaved the ball and it was caught...by a guy in the wrong uniform. No points! At least a field goal gets them within a TD and 2-point conversion of a tie.

Who to Blame?


The blame game is the favorite game for the media and fans to play. Ultimately Gary Kubiak is to blame. Kyle Shanahan calls the offense but Kubiak can change the play or veto the selection.

Many last week were saying the Colts game probably cost Kubes his job. At the point I disagreed. I figured it didn't help his cause and it was something to put on the list when evaluation time comes along at season end.

While I don't think it's the final nail in the coffin but several fans and media are saying the Chris Brown halfback option pass will be the one that cost him his job.

I don't always see eye to eye on Jerome Solomon's Houston Chronicle column and blog but he makes a case on why that specific play won't end the Kubiak regime and it is a whole slew of things that will in the columnKubiak's pink slip merited by more than just one call

Final Thoughts


The Seattle Seahawks come to Reliant for the last home game of 2009. Fans are eager to put this year behind, fire Kubiak, bring in Bill Cowher and make the playoffs.

I'm not eager to put the year behind yet because I want every Sunday to be football Sunday forever. Kubiak may or may not get fired. Bill Cowher isn't coming to Houston and if he does then a rebuilding process is under way which means the playoffs are at least another two or three seasons away. Plus the worst kept secret in football is Cowher wants the Carolina job.

Week 12 - What a Dick Tease!

Still pissed off with the utter failure against the Tennessee Titans, I had low expectations for Sunday's encounter with Pisarcik Manning and the Indy Colts. I would have preferred a blowout to the steaming pile of donkey turd they left on the field Sunday.

Really what reason or hope did the Texans have of winning the game? Manning and Colts own the Texans along the lines 100-1 won loss record. Sure half the Colts defense was missing including Dwight Freeney.

Spare me the cliche's of "If only the Texans could play an entire game..." or "They've been so close to winning games..." or "If it wasn't for this or that..." It's all a pile of bullshit. The bottom line is that the Texans are still a bad football team. Talent alone doesn't define a team. Results on the field define a team. And on the field the Texans have lost more games than they have won. That folks is a bad team.

So where does the blame sit? Top to bottom...coaches and players.

Dunta "Pay Me" Robinson has been scorched all season. He wants to be paid like a shut down, franchise cornerback. Guess what? He doesn't play like one and right now he's at best the third best corner on the team. Frenchy and the rookie Quin have outplayed him big time. Third year corner Fred Bennett has been buried deep under the bench and limited to dime and special teams. Robinson needs to sit next to him as the nickel.

You know you have no confidence in the team when they are up 17-0 and thinking that's not gonna hold up for the game. They need at least 30 if not more.

I was impressed with the game plan to open the game. Texans were successful with the run and some play action. The defense had Manning on his heels with a sack and two interceptions. It didn't last.

The Turning Point?
I had this debate with one of the posters at IntheBullseye.com. At the end of the first half, the Texans ran the clock down to the 2:00 minute warning instead of running one more play. The poster said that the Texans should have run one more play. I completely disagree. It was third down. No need to run a play. Run the time off and use the clock as your friend in keeping Manning off the field. By running a play you give the Colts a free stoppage at the warning. Running it down the Texans run a play. If they fail to convert the third down, at least they kick the field goal and run more time off the clock or it forces the Colts to burn a time out if they want to try and run their offense.

What happened next pretty much sums up the Texans season in a nutshell. Instead of trying to run it and get the clock going the Texans opted to pass. I don't really fault the play call but when has it really worked? It was the same exact play the Texans tried in the closing minutes of the Arizona game and Matt Schaub over threw Joel Dreesen. What happened this time? You guessed it. Schaub wasn't on target. Again. The ended up settling for the field goal and giving Manning the ball back. Fortunately Quin intercepted the ball to end the Colts drive.

Who are These Guys?
I have two theories of what happened next.

Theory one: Those weren't the Texans playing in the first half. Some aliens who knew football took over and played the first half.

Theory two: After the half, the Texans went into the locker room, showered, jumped in their vehicles and went home.

Whatever the case, those were two different teams in each half.

The Buck Stops Where?
Owner Bob McNair has a big decision to make on the future of the team. This franchise is teetering on the brink of being good or falling into a Oakland Raider type abyss. The talent is there.

By most accounts, McNair and general manager Rick Smith were pretty upset after the game. While McNair denies it and claims he will evaluate the coaching staff at season end, I believe Gary Kubiak and the staff are auditioning for next year and I don't think it looks good for them.

I'm not an advocate of changing coaches often. Look at Oakland, Dallas and
Washington. They change coaches like Aggie women change tampons...once every two or three years. What have they achieved? Oakland and Washington are stuck in reverse. Dallas is stuck in mediocrity.

Do I think the Texans need to make a change? If the season keeps spiralling out of control then yes. What if Kubiak rallies the troops and put a win streak together? Maybe. If they put a streak together, McNair needs to think long and hard about it. The key question he needs to ask is "Why did they wait until late in the season, again, for another push?" Is it because Kubiak can't handle the early pressure and loosens up when nothing is less to play for? If a changes is made, what are the options out there?

I'm going to stop now because this blog is now in the to long to read category. I'm cutting it up and addressing the possible coaching changes and replacements and also the advantages and perils of it.

This is why I like working the night shift. I can get all my ramblings out of the way without the yappy yippy sawed off runt barking at me.